Royal newlyweds to honeymoon in Beirut!

'Can't bloody wait!' said Wills regarding the honeymoon in Beirut

Royal couple Prince William and Kate Middleton are planning to spend their honeymoon in the vibrant Lebanese city of Beirut, sources at can reveal. The weekend holiday is set to be the most outrageous Royal getaway since the Queen spent her 60th wedding anniversary getting ‘well mashed’ in Berlin back in 2007.

'Taxi! Very cheap. You and nice lady. Yes yes?'

The Royal newlyweds will be picked up from Beirut’s Rafic Hariri airport by a chauffeur-driven vintage Mercedes and whisked away to a secret budget hostel in the heart of the city where they will occupy the honeymoon suite, which comes with unlimited WIFI access.

'After 15 of these I'm anyone's!' said Wills

Following a quick shower and a shisha pipe, they will then hit the streets of Beirut’s famous Gemmayzeh district, where William is planning to get ‘well pissed’ on local beer Lebanese beer ‘Almaza’. A royal source told our reporter ‘Wills just loves the fresh, clean taste of an ice-cold Almaza, whereas Kate is looking forward to knocking back some Doo Doo shots (a tequila based beverage containing a fresh olive)’

'God you can smell the peasant stench from here'

After a quick hotdog, the couple will then stumble to hip music venue ‘Zico House’, where William plans to sneak in a half bottle of Label 5 whiskey, due to the fact that ‘It’s a bit pricey in there on weekends’. A source said the couple were also looking to ‘score a bit of you-know-what’ if anyone has any. The honeymoon will certainly be a welcome break for the pair, before they return to their back-breaking work of being undeserving multi-millionaires who wave at people from behind bullet proof glass.

by Beirut Beat



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